We worry so much about others' opinions of our work. But let me tell you a secret that will make these worries disappear forever.
We worry so much about others' opinions of our work. But let me tell you a secret that will make these worries disappear forever.
welcome to art for all the sketchbook skool podcast. I'm your host, Danny Gregory. I'm the author of a dozen or so books on art and creativity. And I'm a sketchbook artist. I'm also an amateur critic, especially of the drawings that I make in my own sketchbook. Creative people care so very much what others think of them. They ask, is it any good? And then they wait. Not just for what you say, but for how you say it, it's not enough to be effusive in your praise,were you sincere, really? And does the fact that you say you like it mean that your opinion isn't worth listening to them? Are you a suck up or Simon Cowell? Is there a'but' lurking in your praise? And if you give constructive advice, is it personal? Are you saying I, as well as my work suck? Sure. There are the rare, apparent exceptions who don't give a toss, what anyone else says, but I suspect that they too are motivated by the perceptions of others. They just hide it better sometimes. Others verdicts are integral to what you're making. In my years in advertising the success of an idea was entirely decided by what someone else decided it was worth. Does the client think it's good? Does the consumer think is good? Does my boss like it? Do my peers or award show judges and so on. If I was showing my work in a gallery, the dealers, the critics and the patrons opinions could make or break me. If I act in a show, a review could take bread off my table. Some person I've never met at the New York times could devastate my next book. When I draw in public a passer-by. Might possibly be sneering, even if just to himself sneering at my presumption at being an artist while scrawling in my sketchbook. If I yanked the page out of my book, I must be careful to tear it up so that no one can piece it back together and scoff. I shred the pieces small so that no one thinks that I myself don't know how much it sucks. Sure. I can't draw, but at least I have the taste in judgment to know it. Or maybe I'll leave it in my book, but write a big, long essay next to it. About how bad it is. Hmm, like a reminder and a slap in the head not to do such crap again, if anyone sees it well, they'll read my notation and they'll know that I know better. Of course, it's crap. Do you go through this? So did I, until I discovered a little facts that boils down to this: by and large, no one cares about anyone else but themselves, I don't mean they are all hateful and selfish, just that we're almost all always wrapped up in our own issues. And we can't be much bothered with anyone else's actions except as to how they pertain to us. Doubt me? Prove to yourself Start a conversation with anyone and see how long it takes them to steer the conversation back to themselves. I love your shirt. Yeah. Thanks. It's new. Really? I can never wear pink. I didn't think I could either but you look great in it. Where'd you get it? Uniqlo? No, I, I just love Uniqlo when I can find stuff that fits me. Yeah. I must've gained 10 pounds since Christmas. Try listening instead of talking and see how long the other personal talk about themselves. Be prepared to wait because virtually anyone, if given the stage, we'll hold onto it eternally What are you doing? Drawing? I can't draw a straight line. Even as a kid. I never could. You're great. You must have taken a lot of lessons. Well, um, no, not really. Well, I just have no talent. I used to play the guitar, but you know, who has the time I'm so busy at work since I got that. Promotion... Sound familiar? A few years ago, I gave a colleague, a creative person, a copy of my book everyday matters. And a month later he hadn't said anything about it. So I asked him what he thought of it. And he said, yeah, it was great. Yeah. That's stuff in there about Wales. And my father was from Wales. So I thought it was really interesting. Wales. Really? Oh yeah. Excellent. I waited for more, but that was it. Wales! I'm not talking about hardcore self-involved people, mega bores. I mean, everybody, including me, it goes without saying, I hope spends most of their time thinking about themselves or how, what others are doing affects them, Put simply no one is nearly as interested in what you do. As you are, no one is judging it as hard as you or analyzing it or wondering about it. The only time they really get involved is when your success or failure could affect them, will looking at your work entertain or, divert them for a moment. Oh, your drawing sucks. Nevermind then. If you draw and they don't, are they less than you? Will your work make theirs look worse? Will it make them money? Can they use your technique to improve their work? Will praising you, blind you to them. Seriously. What other motives do they have and are those sufficient reasons for you to be concerned or these sorts of opinions? What drive your work? Are you making art so that others can make money or feel better about their own abilities or worse? Think about it. We all, even Brad Pitt or Donald Trump occupy a tiny percentage of any other given person's interest. That's why some of us are interested in achieving fame because it takes all those tiny percentages and multiplies them across millions of people. And eventually that adds up to something and because we're all at best living in our own self-reflecting bubbles. So you should just relax and do what you want. Stop caring so much about externals, make what you like in the way that you do live and make art for the, the person that truly matters or actually cares you. thanks for joining me today. I'll create something new for you again next week until then I'm Danny Gregory. And this is art for all.